I'm in a glass case of emotion!!

Yesterday was an emotional day. Yesterday was my last day of work. Yesterday I said good bye to patients and friends. Yesterday was the end of a three day funeral flower job. Yesterday was the funeral of a sweet lady I'm glad to be able to consider a friend.

So it's a little daunting to be done with working. In March of 2010, I knew that I needed to rejoin society and start working with patients again. I was at a point in my grief that if I didn't start taking steps to let my life keep moving forward I would have drowned so to speak. So I sought employment as a Physical Therapist Assistant for McMeen PT. Which I have loved! Caring for patients and helping others move forward physically has helped me to keep moving forward myself. After two years of working with a great team, I decided I was ready to be a stay at home mom and get back 'on plan.' So now today is a little overwhelming. As of today, I am responsible for making sure that I keep moving my family forward. I will be 'on my own' on those days when memories hit me and I want to pull the car over and curl up in a ball, instead of going on to see the patient I need to see. But I think I'll be able to lean on the Lord and on my family to help me keep going. Having the liberty to get out of the house on a walk or on an adventure with the kids will really help. I'm not scared of being home but I am a little nervous.

Emotions always run rampant surrounding the death of a dear friend, especially when that involves the honor of preparing the flowers for her funeral....and lack of sleep. Pat's family told us that she loved yellows and oranges, especially gladiolus and yellow roses. Pat was such a ray of sunshine to our community. As I think back on her I keep thinking about how she lived her life: working hard, staying true to herself, loving her family and supporting us 'young kids.' Those around Pat never wondered how she felt because she always shared her thoughts/opinions on the subject. It is evident by the fact that her funeral filled two churches, that she was loved in this community. It is so hard to think that she is gone. But when I see gladiolus and yellow roses, I will think of Pat and the sunshine that she brought to our lives. She's an example of how we should live our lives...working hard, staying active, smiling always and always adding sunshine to the lives of those around her. I will certainly miss seeing her white suburban and her smile and wave in town.

My favorite memory of Pat happened a couple of weeks ago...Pat was rarely at a loss of words; always ready to visit. Paxton and I were at the bank and he was dressed in full cowboy garb: head to toe. Pat said, "Well hello there cowboy! How are you today?" He responded by tipping his hat and saying, "Howdy Ma'am!" Not expecting such a big response she just stared at him and looked at me and said, "I don't even know what to say!" :) He made me so proud and gave us quite a little laugh that he shocked Pat so!

I know that as sad as it is to lose people and it's hard to go through loss and grief, I want to live my life as Pat did and touch the lives of those around me. Now that I don't have to be away from this great community to work, I can spend more time being involved. I don't want to live in the same town with people and yet not care about them. The preacher at Pat's funeral didn't have to say anything about Pat...they way she lived her life said it all. I heard once that we should live our lives in way that the preacher won't have to lie at our funeral. Pat's life was just that way. I'm so thankful for the comfort that she is in Heaven with Jesus...probably dancing with her husband.

Thank you for the example of your life, Pat. You will be truly missed.

Wooden Huevos aka Painted Eggs

I'm so excited to post my first craft blog! I got the idea to paint a dozen wooden eggs for Easter this year. I decided to paint them bright colors then distress them. So here you have it....Wooden Huevos...(blame Merle for the catchy name....I'm not joking!)

 I chose a paint collection for convenience...use whatever paints. I also think it would be super cute to do a black, red, white version for a year round decor in a rooster kitchen. (Rose has these black and white roosters with red combs that make me want a black and white and red kitchen!)

 Any ways....paint all the eggs. I did one thick coat and then touched up where my fingers were. I painted 8 solid colors and 4 a tanish color to do speckling.

 After the paint was dry...like 20 minutes. I used a medium sand paper and distressed them. This happens to be my favorite egg! Love the bright teal.

I had a cute Easter bowl...originally was thinking about a great big Mason jar...but found this. Also check out the speckled ones. I dipped an old paintbrush in paint and splattered away...I tried to take a picture...fail! I needed more hands!

So the whole project was about....6 bucks. The eggs came in packs of 4 for 2.99 (half price sale at HoLo so $1.50...Kachiga!) and the paint was $2 ish...so $6.50? Oh yeah! Winner winner!

Happy Mother's Day...only 34 months late!

I spent part of my childhood (the best part!) in the Sandhills by Tryon, NE. It was there that I first developed my love for the Hereford cattle. My first (and I think only) 4H heifer was a Hereford.  I've always found the sight of a herd of the red-white-faced cattle grazing on hills of green to be sweet and the epitome of 'Home.' My Grandpa Dan welded a Hereford bull shaped mailbox. The love of this beautiful docile breed is fairly irrational...but runs deep anyway!

So anyway....this is love. Seriously. My husband loves me so much that, despite knowing that Herefords are not exactly well known for their calving ease or their lack of prolapses or their great eye health, he decided he would indulge my dream of owning some....and promised me one for Mother's Day....2010! There was a sweet little ticket on my pillow.

So the search was on! She had to look like a 'classic' Hereford. We looked around...Easter of 2011 was born the perfect match for me...according to Merle and the rancher. The original idea was that I'd feed a bucket calf and she would be a pet. But thanks to a husband who's a vet and a brother in law who's a rancher, I was convinced that leaving her on her mama until weaning and then running her with Blake's grass fed herd would give her better chances at being a great 'matriarc of the herd.' So on St. Patrick's Day, the day had come to go get our little Hereford heifer and bring her home! So without further adieu...Meet Gladys, my first Hereford heifer!

She's not solid Hereford, she's Hereford and something something with a bit of something....(aka theoretically she should have better calving ease, decreased prolapse tendency and better eyes...and if she doesn't? Well Daddy's a vet so we're covered!!!) but she's so purdy and I love her already!

The name? Well I was going for a sweet old fashioned name and that one popped into my head. Now, it also happens to be my Great Grandma's first name...so I'd like to point out that she's in no way named AFTER Gramma King but bears the same name by coincidence! But when I think about it, Gramma was sweet, kind, wise, and a wonderful mother....which I would think are very good traits for a cow!

So cross our fingers! This adventure begins! I'm so in love with her and have assured the guys that yes they can (& will) fit her whole name on her ear tag...this is what I had in mind. ;)

Ha ha! Just kidding!! But it better have her name on it somewhere!!! I don't imagine we'll be big time ranchers, but having a Hereford in my herd (herd of one till next spring anyways!) makes me smile!

The Armor of God

I know that God speaks to us in a variety of ways. This past week He spoke to my heart by way of coincidence. Three times the expression 'Put on the Armor of God' came across my path: 1 while playing knight with Paxton, 2 Matt taught on it at youth group 3 (and most random) on a marquis sign at a Car Wash in Kearney. So as I was thinking about why on earth I'd hear that expression so many times in one week, I kept coming back to the biggest battle I'm facing personally: grieving over Addy. The hardest part for me at this point is I want to give God the control and believe that He will heal my heart...but the ache in my heart sometimes feels like the only connection that I still have to her. I no longer remember what she smelled like or trivial things like that. So I put the emotions on a shelf and there they sit until something knocks them off the shelf and I gotta deal with them. Well while Matt was teaching on the armor (Ephesians 6:10-18) he prompted the kids to picture a Roman soldier. Specifically the sword of the spirit. What did a Roman soldier's sword look like? Long and thin? Curved? He described it as being only 18-24 inches long...here's the kicker. He stated, "So you'd have to be pretty close to whoever you were fighting in order to do any good."

So this goes two ways for me. I gotta get close to the Lord and His sweet spirit. I gotta lean on Him and rely on him to work it out perfectly for my life. I know that only He has the power to both heal my heart and help me to remember my baby girl. Secondly, I can know longer keep this grieving process on a shelf. I gotta get up close and personal with it. Roll up my sleeves and take swipes and swings and stabs at this whole thing. Anyone ever seen Braveheart? That hand to hand battle isn't pretty and I don't imagine this will be either....but nothing got solved sitting on the sidelines right? I don't know what this is gonne look like but I do know that I have the beginnings of a willing heart....Oh speaking of heart...I was treating a patient the other day and she has a calendar with scripture on it. The day that I saw was Ezekiel 36:26...I will give you a new heart and put a new spirit in you; I will remove from you your heart of stone and give you a heart of flesh....sounds like a good start to me.

Heavenly Father, I ask you to put a new heart in me...take this heart of stone and help me to be sensitive to your Spirit as I draw near to you. Help me to confront my fears and the hurts in 'hand to hand battle.' Help my journey to encourage others as they deal with hardships of life. Thank you for your promises in your Word. In your precious and wonderful name, Amen.

Crazy Busy Weekend!

What a fun weekend we had! This post is mostly about my little BIG boy! I'm not sure why but I often feel that it's necessary to get really excited about even the littlest things...usually dubbing them  a surprise. Such as 'Paxton I have a surprise for you'...whether it's going to North Platte for a quick shopping trip or going to Camp Maranatha for a skating party then to Kearney for a swim in the pool. I feel the need to hold it over his head as a surprise. I've been accused of being dramatic a time or two! We get really excited! And there may be some jumping up and down....maybe.

(As dramatic as I can be in the good parts of life...I'm amazingly controlled and collected in times of stress....like when the little man escapes while I'm sleeping in a hotel in Kearney....that's all I'll say about this....(it's never fun to admit mistakes in parenting...this is my blog and I don't have to say if I don't want to!) :) In all seriousness lock the deadbolt...please don't say, 'Well duh'...) Annyyywwhooo........

The kids and I headed to a birthday party for my cousin Jake who turned 6 (in my mind...he actually turned 12...WHAT!?) at Camp Maranatha...rollerskating and rock climbing wall. I haven't skated in forever. 4-EV-ER! Paxton was pretty excited for surprise number one. Aunt Brenda took him around the gym once. After that it was all high speed! He just took off RUNNING on his skates...then turning backwards and then back around. All the while I'm pretty proud that I'm just standing...a tailbone broken twice is more than enough for me! I didn't do too bad I must admit! I only rolled over Paxton's hand once....after that he learned to keep out of my way! Well, after about 96 trips around the gym on skates P was ready to climb the rock wall.

He patiently waited in line (me so proud) and got his harness on. Then Papa Tony assisted him the first few tries at the hand and foot holds. Then the rope operator starts hoisting my precious baby boy like 8,000 feet in the air! And what does my sweet boy do? Giggles! Grin ear to ear! Wave to me! No crying. No asking for Mommy...nothin! Just hangs in the air. Then the operator says, "Do you want to come down fast or slow?" And FAST he came! Oh my word! Daddy would have been so proud! Our son is fearless!

Now on to the hotel....Paxton finally puts 2 and 2 together...(and got four...yea he's good at math....sorry for the lame joke...I've never understood that saying...another day another blog post!)  and realizes there's a pool in the hotel (hence the running away) and now the excitement is through the roof! (On his adventure he found that there's a pirate ship and a 'big daddy slide.') So here we go. We don our suits and life jackets (I'm really not a negligent parent....) and off we go. Thank goodness Gramma is here! Coz two kids and one mommy just doesn't work in a pool area. P immediately goes checking out the stuff. And when explained to that running is dangerous he takes on this new 'strut', it's not technically running...but I'm not sure of the safety....for mommy who might drown from laughing. So he's up one slide and down and in an out and having a blast! The time came for the big daddy slides and I explained to him the rules....only the green one, feet first, no running, take turns, etc. So here he goes. I'm standing at the base of the green slide and next to me out of the yellow enclosed slide shoots my little man in a life jacket.  Whoops! got too excited and went on the yellow one...mistake made. Lesson learned! So up and down up and down up and down up and down...you get it. And every time he went up? He blew a kiss to his mama! Sweet grown up little man. I once had a college roommate tell me that 'You have a problem....you're too loud.' Well I apparently passed on this loud gene. Coz we could always tell when P was on his way down....from the yelling! He had such a good time and he was so polite. Made me so happy! (Lyla loved the little 2 inch pool and floating with Gramma.)

Now on to shopping....I am proud to say that I have trained him so well. While at HoLo, he's riding in mom's cart...that only has 2 items in it. He tells her, "Gramma you're supposed to FILL your cart!" Oh yeah that's my boy! (I'd love to say that the shopping trip was uneventful but....my car died in Wal-mart parking lot and I had to 'shanghai' a parking spot so that my dad could come rescue mom and I. (Thanks to a man unwilling to help a couple dames in distress (whoa when did I become a dame and not a damsel...shoot) who just drove off....) I stood in the spot that happened to be close enough to connect jumper cables and didn't let anyone park. This van with two men pulled up and looked at me and I walked the their window and said (words sometimes put themselves in their own weird order coming out of my mouth), "I'm waiting for my dad to come jump my car so unless you're going to jump it, you can't have the spot!" (They were willing to help...it was a pretty good spot at Wal-mart on a sunny Saturday.) So car got started and we headed to Carlos O'Kellys (if you are reading this and you've known me for very long you have just thought to yourself...'Shocking!' And that's ok) my favorite restaurant! Hands down!

After a nice dinner, We. Found. This......and it was hilarious!

When I became a Mommy to Paxton...when I saw his teeny weeny heart beating on the Ultrasound ...when I was in labor for 24 hours and broke my tailbone in delivery...when I held his tiny little hand for the first time....I had NO IDEA what I was in for! It is a wild crazy ride....but one that I love. I cannot help but be filled with joy when I'm with this kid! I hope he always hits life at a full fledged run (not that funny little strut!) and with a zest that can't be dampened.

After a weekend like that, this Mama needs sleep! (And Daddy needs a turn with his offspring!) Thank you Lord for my little man...for His precious little ways...and help me to see the world through his eyes....Coz I bet it's a tad bit amusing!

Let the Adventure Begin!

So I've been thinking for quite sometime that I'd love to join the blogging world. There are several blogs I follow and L.O.V.E. love! I get a lot of inspiration and encouragement from watching other mama's make their homes into beautiful places for their families to live and grow and learn to love Jesus. I knew that I wouldn't have time to do that while I was still a 'work outta the home' Mama. So now that the countdown is on to my last day (9 more work days!), I decided to start my blog up. So let's try a 25 random things to get this going!
1. As of March 31 I will have two new employers...Paxton & Lyla, ages 4 and 1.
2. I love them more than life....no one else has the ability to make me lose my mommy guard and giggle!  (Like today when Paxton was about to be scolded and he decides to do this hilarious belly dance which made me laugh...much to my dismay. How does he do that!?)
3. My favorite things to make in the kitchen are: homemade ice cream and apple pie.
4. My #1 obsession is how I'm going to decorate the house. I'm even dreaming about it! (Hopefully the blog will be an outlet!)
5. 25 things is a lot to come up with!
6. My son is named after my great grandma's maiden name and his daddy's middle name, Paxton Jacob.
7. Lyla's named after the lead actress in August Rush. As well as our dear friend Carol who passed away just hours before Ly was born....giving us Lyla Caroline.
8. My white knight and I have been married almost 7 years. Really? That long!
9. We have a beautiful baby girl waiting for us up in Heaven....Addison Rose.
10. She's the only reason I know a single thing about rose gardening! (Stay tuned for her garden this summer!)
11. I love chocolate! I love it to eat, to look at and to decorate with!
12. The blog name comes from my letterboxing trail name Pinwheel Pioneer....
13. ...which comes from my love of the pinwheel quilt block. I love to letterbox...my husband thinks it's dumb!
14. I love to laugh....
15. It seems like my house is rampant with unorganized organization! (#378 on my "GoalsWhenIStayHome" list)
16. I am a floral designer at a store owned by one of my best friends.....it's so fun...and stressful!
17. My favorite drink is what I call 'Foot Juice' (only because it smells like feet!) Apple Cider Vinegar, pomegranet Crystal Light and dietary iodine....Sounds terrible but is like coffee to my tired need more energy body!
18. I have no idea what to make for supper tonight!
19. I need to go for a run to train for this half marathon I signed up for!....ugh!
20. I have about 20 surrogate children....ages ranging from 12-18...my Ground Zero Youth Group kids.
21. I still haven't mailed all of my Christmas letters yet!
22. I can't get enough of little girl tights! So glad they are so 'in'...even if they aren't Lyla's gonna sport them!
23. My name comes from my Dad. Tony LeRon. Contrary to popular belief my 'r' isn't big....Leron!
24. I could spend all day and all night quilting....with pinwheels!
25. Jesus is my Lord and Savior and He amazes me with His love every day.

Wow...ok well I think we're off to a good start! And I still have just enough time to get the kitchen clean and get some supper in the oven....we're back to that again. What goes good with Apple Pie?

Thanks for stopping by!